In almost no time at all my life has gone from a symbol of perfection, to a system that is rotting through so bad it is no longer stable enough to hold itself together; and it is only doing so by chance.
I can feel The Tower in my Tarot dancing along the corners of my path.
I am in the mood to welcome it.
Yet a mood is just a mood, simply an emotion slipping through for a moment in time; although important that moment is.
This particular mood is one that holds more significance than most others in my life. It is the huge turning points that this one relates to, ones that bring me to higher plateaus and new energies.
It is very difficult to simply let this mood pass with out my heart churning towards its destination.
Even were it to bring about some initial disappointment or heartbreak, it would maintain its worth.
It would signify the ultimate breaking of chains, the demise of loyalty to petrified opinion, the quintessential freedom that my experience has finally brought me to.
It would be the greatest love of self that I could demonstrate.
In many purposes, I deem it necessary, but I merely continue to wait in the twilight. The circumstances and experiences I have gained are greatly treasured, and a whimsical wind of doubt tells me I should not act so foolish. How could I give up such gold and call myself intelligent? How could I deny the abundance in family I have gained through this long experience?
How could I end such a thing, when I have never done an ending right in my adult life?
It is the most magnificent crashing, an awesome apocalypse, that I should hold on so dear to, and yet despise so much of my everyday life.
